Wedding reading
The Impressive Clergyman’s speech — "Mawage"
William Goldman, for the 1987 film of The Princess Bride
“The Impressive Clergyman’s speech — "Mawage"” by William Goldman, for the 1987 film of The Princess Bride, is a prose reading read at a wedding ceremony. It takes about a minute and a half read aloud, usually by a guest reader. We do not reprint the words here — the note below says why, and what to bring instead.
Why the words are not printed here
Do not recite it. The phonetic joke was written for the film — William Goldman’s screenplay, delivered by Peter Cook — and does not exist in that form in Goldman’s 1973 novel, so the book is not a workaround. Either nod to it in your own words as you open, or clear the bit with the studio. It is also two minutes of a room waiting for one gag.
Pieces still in copyright are listed by title and author only — we name them and tell you where to get them, but we do not reproduce the words. Public-domain text is printed in your script in full.
Where it comes from
In the 1987 film, directed by Rob Reiner from William Goldman’s screenplay, Peter Cook plays the Impressive Clergyman.
What it says
In the film, a solemn clergyman with a heavy speech impediment opens a wedding by intoning about marriage and true love, and the comedy comes from the gap between his grand manner and the way the words come out. It is a quick visual and vocal gag, not a reading in any usual sense, and it depends on the audience knowing the film. At a wedding it is a nod to a shared favorite rather than something read for its meaning.
Everyone asks. It is film dialogue, not the novel — nod to it in your own words instead. Read at a wedding ceremony. Themes: mawage · the Impressive Clergyman · The Princess Bride · a film quotation · an officiant who wants to open with a laugh · a bit rather than a reading.
Who it suits
Couples and guests who know the film well, and relaxed, playful ceremonies. It suits an officiant who wants to open with a laugh. It does not work at a formal or religious service, or for guests who have never seen the film.
Where it goes in the ceremony
At the very start, as the officiant’s first words after the processional, before moving into a proper welcome. Keep it to one line or a reference, not a full routine.
Reading it aloud
Allow about a minute and a half at a ceremony pace of about 130 words a minute, from the reader’s first word to their last.
- Do not recite the film speech; nod to it in your own words. The joke is film dialogue, and a single reference gets the laugh.
- Keep it short. A long version leaves the room waiting for one punch line.
- Once the laugh lands, switch to your real welcome straight away. The contrast makes the opening work.
Questions about reading it aloud
How long does “The Impressive Clergyman’s speech — "Mawage"” take to read aloud?
“The Impressive Clergyman’s speech — "Mawage"” takes about a minute and a half read aloud at a ceremony pace, which is slower than conversation — roughly 130 words a minute. That is the figure the run-sheet uses when it works out the timing for the whole service.
Who usually reads “The Impressive Clergyman’s speech — "Mawage"”?
Usually a guest reader rather than the officiant. “The Impressive Clergyman’s speech — "Mawage"” runs about a minute and a half, which is a manageable amount to hand to a friend or family member. Give them a printed copy of their own, in a size they can read without their glasses, and tell them where to stand and how you will introduce them.
Can “The Impressive Clergyman’s speech — "Mawage"” be printed in a ceremony script?
Not by us. Do not recite it. The phonetic joke was written for the film — William Goldman’s screenplay, delivered by Peter Cook — and does not exist in that form in Goldman’s 1973 novel, so the book is not a workaround. Either nod to it in your own words as you open, or clear the bit with the studio. It is also two minutes of a room waiting for one gag.
A reading is two minutes of the hour.
The rest is the welcome, the vows, the ring exchange, the pronouncement — and the timing that holds them together. Answer some questions about the couple and get the whole ceremony, written out, with this reading in its place.
Other readings that suit the same service
- from The Importance of Being Earnest, Act Itwo minutesWit about marriage from the stage, public domain
- A Lovely Love Storya minute and a halfA light reading that does not depend on a film
- A Word to Husbands10 secondsA four-line laugh about marriage
- On Marriage, from The Propheta minute and a halfKahlil Gibran
- On Becoming Real, from The Velveteen Rabbit55 secondsMargery Williams
- from Obergefell v. Hodgesa minute and a halfJustice Anthony Kennedy