Wedding reading

Yes, I'll Marry You, My Dear

Pam Ayres

“Yes, I'll Marry You, My Dear” by Pam Ayres is a poem read at a wedding ceremony. It takes about two minutes read aloud, usually by a guest reader. We do not reprint the words here — the note below says why, and what to bring instead.

Why the words are not printed here

Still in copyright. It is reproduced on half the wedding blogs on the internet without permission and the wordings drift — print it from With These Hands or another properly sourced copy rather than from a search result.

Pieces still in copyright are listed by title and author only — we name them and tell you where to get them, but we do not reproduce the words. Public-domain text is printed in your script in full.

Where it comes from

Pam Ayres’s collection With These Hands was published by Orion in 1998.

What it says

The speaker accepts a proposal and then explains, cheerfully, all the useful things her new husband will be doing for her: getting up for the crying baby, going downstairs to check the strange noise in the night, and a long list of other jobs she has no plan to do herself. Underneath the teasing is real affection. By the end the joking has made the point that marriage means sharing the dull and difficult parts of life, and having someone there for all of them, into old age.

A crowd-pleaser at British weddings. Bring a properly sourced copy — the versions online differ. Read at a wedding ceremony. Themes: yes I'll marry you my dear · a long list of what he will actually be doing · affectionate teasing · very popular in British ceremonies · broad and warm.

Who it suits

British and Commonwealth families who know Pam Ayres, couples who want to laugh during the ceremony, and relaxed weddings of any size. It fits a bride or friend of the bride who enjoys performing. A couple who want gender-neutral material will need a different piece, since it is written from the bride’s side.

Where it goes in the ceremony

Usually the lighter of two readings, after a more serious one. It can also be read at the reception as part of a speech. A friend or relative with good comic timing reads it best.

Reading it aloud

Allow about two minutes at a ceremony pace of about 130 words a minute, from the reader’s first word to their last.

Print it from the book. The versions online differ, and the jokes depend on the exact words.
Ayres writes in rhyme and rhythm. Let the meter carry you and the punch lines will land on their own.
Look at the groom on the teasing lines. The laughter is warmer when the room can see who it is aimed at.

Questions about reading it aloud

How long does “Yes, I'll Marry You, My Dear” take to read aloud?

“Yes, I'll Marry You, My Dear” takes about two minutes read aloud at a ceremony pace, which is slower than conversation — roughly 130 words a minute. That is the figure the run-sheet uses when it works out the timing for the whole service.

Who usually reads “Yes, I'll Marry You, My Dear”?

Usually a guest reader rather than the officiant. “Yes, I'll Marry You, My Dear” runs about two minutes, which is a manageable amount to hand to a friend or family member. Give them a printed copy of their own, in a size they can read without their glasses, and tell them where to stand and how you will introduce them.

Can “Yes, I'll Marry You, My Dear” be printed in a ceremony script?

Not by us. Still in copyright. It is reproduced on half the wedding blogs on the internet without permission and the wordings drift — print it from With These Hands or another properly sourced copy rather than from a search result.

A reading is two minutes of the hour.

The rest is the welcome, the vows, the ring exchange, the pronouncement — and the timing that holds them together. Answer some questions about the couple and get the whole ceremony, written out, with this reading in its place.

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